philosophyonwheels.com

Car insurance.  Who doesn’t enjoy paying that?  It is a useful and sometimes legally required service to have to guard against theft, hail, missiles, explosions, riots, and … oh yeah, accidents.  Maybe the actuaries of the world deserve a tip of that hat for mitigating financial risk on the highway and enabling the car culture that we enjoy.  Otherwise, could you imagine getting in an accident and then being saddled with $50,000 in liabilities?  Or you could pay a conveniently small fee every month to have a big company assume that risk.  I’ll opt for the latter.

Recently I switched my car insurance in order to save some money.  A few days after I placed the phone call I received an impressive package of syntactically exacting legal documents describing exactly what services I will be paying for.  (While leafing through I happened to find the legal definition for war!…I felt like a senator.)  Included in the package was a letter addressed to my current car insurance company.  I was instructed to sign the document and send it ASAP.  It was a short letter politely informing the reader that I was switching my coverage.  And the last sentence was a request for the company to send my refund in check form to my address.

A refund.  This is something that I think not a lot of people realize.  Paying a six month car insurance premium does not bind you to insurance company X for the entire six months.  (That sounds more like a cell phone plan.)  At any point in time you have the financial right to switch insurance companies and then claim a refund for the money that insurance company X did not use.  For example, I start a policy on January 1 with insurance co. X and pay for six months at $400.  But on April 1 I find a better deal with insurance co. Z and switch, I can politely request from X a check for nearly $200.  Free your mind and your car insurance will follow…

Why is this not well known?  It’s because business preys on ignorance.  Any financial edge that a company can use against the masses is a good business strategy.  And unfortunately ignorance tends to fall in big business’s favor.  Insurance companies love to advertise on TV and their ads are always filled with reasons to switch to them or why their current policy holders are happy (i.g. lower rates, better customer service, etc.).  This angle of advertising is win-win for the company.  But a commercial that informs people of their right to a refund on their premium can potentially encourage current policy holders to seek cheaper rates elsewhere. That kind of television commercial would be a bad business decision.  

Let’s continue with insurance commercials since we’re already there.  As far as I have observed, the leading representatives for car insurance on television include a British-accented lizard, a bubbly sales associate from California, and the former President of the United States from the series ‘24′.  The odd one out is a venerable looking actor dressed professionally!  Get with the times, the President should be replaced by something like Big Bird to completely distract people from that product they represent which is … damn, I forgot.  Oh well.  My point is that Big Bird looks like a big safe and yellow airbag that will protect me no matter how fast I drive.

Magnetorheological damping is a badass technology.  (Pronunciation tutorial: Lead villain in X-Men: The Last Stand…”Magneto.”  Really old MP3 player…”Rio.”  Spock’s favorite word…”logical.”  Put ‘em together: “Magneto”…”Rio”…”logical”.  Sweet.)  There’s no coincidence that the pronunciation tutorial came up with three examples plucked from geekdom, these shock absorbers are science-fiction level cool.  Though usually only found on high-end cars, it’s a technology worth understanding for the effect of appreciation.  Perhaps a bit of a refresher on shock absorbers is needed.

Shock absorbers.  It’s one of those pieces of technology we each depend on every time we drive our cars but their praise is never sung.  And as long they are functioning properly the ride is smooth they don’t need a fleeting thought.  Usually the only time they are ever mentioned is in a sentence spoken with extreme irritation or disappointment (i.g. “The mechanic had to replace my shocks”).  

The wheels on a car are not mounted in a fixed position.  (That would be a VERY bumpy ride.)  Between the wheel and the car is a heavy duty spring.  It allows the wheel to make two corrective movements.  

1) If the car hits a bump in the road, the wheel will be forced up toward the car to lessen the upward movement for the car and its occupants.  

2)If the car hits a pothole, the spring will force the wheel down (faster than gravity) into the void to catch the vehicle and control its “fall”.  

The problem with a spring is that it oscillates.  If a spring were attached to the ceiling with a weight, and someone pulled the weight down and released it, the spring would probably bob up and down (oscillate) for a minute or two.  Various forms of friction (such as wind resistance) slow the weight down and eventually bring it to a standstill.  The friction is damping the spring system to bring it a halt.  This is exactly what shock absorbers do.  Shocks absorbers damp energy from the spring to bring the entire system to a motionless equilibrium.

Usually mounted inside of the spring, shock absorbers look like a telescoping tube.  Inside the tube is a combination of oil and gas separated by some pistons.  The gas will expand and contract, but oil does not.  As the piston moves inside the damper, oil rushes past it and produces friction proportional to the viscosity (thickness) of the oil.  (The higher the viscosity the stronger the friction.)  This friction is the fundamental damping force.

Now what if the viscosity of the oil in the damper could be changed on the fly?  The suspension would no longer be passive and would be considered semi-active.  Magnetorheological dampers contain oil with special particles suspended in the fluid.  When these particles are excited by a magnetic field, they tend to clump together and this clumping greatly increases the experienced viscosity.  

So when is it preferable to have greater viscosity in the dampers?  In racing situations it’s preferred to sacrifice comfort for quicker response from the suspension.  With just the flick of a finger, a sport mode can be activated which turns on electromagnets in the dampers and instantly delivers a stiffer and sportier ride.  And it’s just as easy to switch back for the more comfortable ride.

What car do you pick up to experience magnetorheological dampers?  I recommend the Cadillac XLR.  This technology is on a number of different sports cars, but only the XLR looks like it deserves dampers from Geordi La Forge’s garage.  Kudos Cadillac.

I wish I could say exactly how it feels to drive with magneto dampers, but I will admit I have never had the pleasure.  I then appeal to any of my readers to entrust their XLR to me for one day to enable one of my car reviews.  (I prefer “Radiant Silver” but would be willing to drive “Elektra Blue Tintcoat.”)

Left lane lingerers.  You know exactly what I am talking about.  These are the drivers who have chosen to ignore the cryptic highway signs that read “slower traffic keep right” or “keep right except to pass.”  It might be confusing if one considers the ambiguity of the keyword “right,” otherwise these signs might be interpreted as asking the driver to maintain correctness.  It’s actually confusing…

In 1956 President Eisenhower signed the Federal Aid Highway Act of 1956 into law.  Its purpose was to build over 40,000 miles of limited-access, two-lane highway.  With World War II still fresh on everyone’s mind the major rationale was to allow for swift movement of military personnel and equipment throughout the country in the event of another war.  (Minimum overpass clearances were set according to the dimensions of mobile rocket launchers.  Sweet.)  The Eisenhower Interstate System eventually grew into a role as the circulatory system for America’s commerce.  It also redefined how future generations would work and live, giving rise to suburbia.  Sweet.

Those original 40,000 miles had a minimum of two lanes in each direction.  One for traveling, and one for passing.  Let me reiterate: one lane is meant for traveling (the right lane), and the other lane is meant for passing (the left lane).  If a Peterbilt is hauling a bazillion tons of gravel up Donner Pass, you can safely pass at speed and you will not be delayed from satiating your blackjack addiction in Reno.  But after more than half a century there still exists some confusion to this traveling/passing convention.

Perhaps we could use some exemplary behavior to look up to.  We then need a country that is both highly ordered, organized and efficient.  That’s easy: Germany.  

The Autobahn is truly a wondrous automotive experience.  Honestly it puts America’s interstate system into a second tier.  Take the worst section of the Autobahn and I bet that it’s still higher quality than an average section of America’s highways.

The Autobahn is typically three lanes.  Lane three is used by trucks and underpowered subcompacts.  Lane two is for average traffic.  And lane one is for important, rich, and/or good-looking people.  This lane is nearly exclusive to high-end sports cars doing 100+ mph.  It can be dangerous to be doing anything less than 70 mph in this lane.  What I love about the German character is that the respect for order and efficiency allows no room for the ego on the Autobahn.  If a car is in lane one and a Porsche 911 is bearing down from behind, the Porsche only needs to flash the high-beams once and the first car will slip into lane two.  Simple.  No confusion.

But it’s not that simple back here across the pond.  Let’s explore some typical scenarios.

There is a lingerer in the left lane with a car approaching from behind at speed.  The first flash of the high-beam goes unheeded by the lingerer.  Then just as the overtaking car starts the lane change into the right lane, the lingerer does the same and an awkward dance is done as both cars sort out who is going where.  It’s highly dangerous, confusing, and the situation is easily avoided altogether.  I hate when this happens.

Now there is a stubborn lingerer in the left lane.  These are the drivers who regard lane one as the object of their personal automotive Manifest Destiny (Eisenhower was obviously thinking only of them.)  The overtaking car changes to the right lane and initiates a pass.  Just for spite the lingerer increases speed and the overtaking car is eventually blocked from passing by additional traffic in the right lane.  This is immature, and it happens all the time.  I hate when this happens.

We need Barack Obama to appoint German Prime Minister Angela Merkel as secretary for the Department of Transportation.  Hopefully she can bring some of that Autobahn order and inject it into our highway behavior.  Or maybe some negative reinforcing electroshock therapy for those left lane lingerers.  That sounds fun, possibly radical, but definitely prudent.  That will be change I can believe in.